Chapter 5: Give me chocolate
“Valentine is…”
As her head was holding tightly by Tama, Kagami no longer wanted to go back to reading her books, and started explaining.
“…the ceremonial day of various places on earth which the ruler had accepted the Christianity, it was said to be originated from the ceremonial day of the Roman god, Juno.”
“Juno, huh.”
Tsurugi muttered in a monologous tone.
“It would equate to the Greek goddess Hera —— her impression might be just her deep jealousy towards the partners of her unfaithful husband driving her to kill, but she is known as『The god of household and marriage』……”
“The origin of the word『Valentine』is from saint Valentinus.”
Kagami continued talking in a calm tone as if she was referencing to the record data.
“During that time, the Roman emperor said『Soldiers falling in love will decrease their morale』, so they made laws to forbid marriage. Saint Valentinus felt pity for the soldiers who were captivated by love and secretly conducted their marriages, later he was captured —— and eventually executed. So the fourteenth of February is the day to mourn to saint Valentinus’ tragedy and pray to him.”
“Errm……errm……”
Tama showed an obvious bewilderment as she listened to the difficult story, then muttered as she played with Kagami’s hair (she looked just like an animal.)
“But… err… Nozomi-chan my classmate said——”
Is she embarrassed? as she was now pulling Kagami’s cheeks.
“Balentine is the day when we confess to the person we l-l-l-love……”
“Ah, yes, it becomes a custom like that in Japan.”
So she finally felt irritated, huh. as Kagami used her hands to push Tama’s face away.
“Ishishishishi— So Tama is at the age to be curious about something like that already, huh?”
Tsurugi looked happy as she made a pitter-patter sound using her slippers. (By the way, Tsurugi had bad manners as she sat cross-legged on the desk. She was playing a game on her mobile game console.)
“I love Valentine’s.”
“Funya. That’s unexpected.”
“In the numerous events of the whole year, it’s the day with loads of ero-events, along with Christmas, you know!”
“Nee-san’s point is just dirty.”
Under Kagami’s disgusted gaze, Tsurugi stayed calm.
“Well, without such a chance, you would be embarrassed and can’t confess your love though. With being occupied daily by this and that, normally no one can muster the courage to confess on their own without the compulsion from an event like this. Particularly those kids who don’t have much experience in love.”
“I have no interest so I don’t care.”
“Hau… hau…”
Kagami still read the book in a disinterested manner, while Tama reacted nervously upon hearing『Love』.
“Thanks to it, it’s always restless on this day in school every year, I can’t be at peace at all with the meaningful gaze from those darned colleagues. Are they happy getting chocolate from me? Those damn lolicons! My wallet will be empty by giving chocolate to every one of them! And my household income, with two dependants, is my salary alone too!”
Come to think of it, the younger two of the three Yagami sisters were still students, Tsurugi was the only full-fledged member of society.
Tsurugi kicked Onii-chan without reason as if she was irritated, before idly lying down on the desk.
“Since Tama doesn’t know Valentine’s, so she doesn’t have it —— But Kagami, have you already delivered your chocolate? It’s best to just give it to them for now, be it courtesy chocolate or whatever, if you raise the affection level of the boys, your life will be easier later on, you know? Like they help carrying heavy stuff for you or something……”
“That’s too calculating.”
Kagami still hadn’t change her expression.
“Funya. Comparing the time needed to prepare chocolate to the rewards in the form of goodwill from the boy who obtained it, the demerit would be a lot more. Also, I don’t even have a friend of the same gender, and I’m isolated in class, so it’s impossible for me to talk to a boy and hand him chocolate anyway.”
“You should enjoy your youth a bit more, you know……?”
Tsurugi’s amazement was filled with a slight worry.
“Come to think of it, I haven’t see you talk to anyone but me at school —— Ah, how about Tsukuyomi? Why don’t give him chocolate? You can get along well and talk to Tsukuyomi even with your broken communication skills, don’t you?”
“Hah?”
Kagami’s voice raised slightly in pitch.
“I-I don’t understand what you mean. I don’t exactly get along well with Sensei. It’s just I’m over-familiar with him. It’s illogical.”
“You don’t have to deny it that much……”
Confused, Tsurugi placed a hand on her small breasts and sighed.
“I see, so Kagami didn’t give…… Tama is of course, didn’t prepare chocolate too —— and the other girls don’t approach Tsukuyomi either, so…… ehehe.”
She somehow seemed so happy.
“Err, Tsurugi-sensei.”
Onii-chan, who viewed the conversation between the three sister in bewilderment, timidly raised his hand.
“I don’t really quite get the relation between『The day of love confession』and『Chocolate』, it means Valentine’s is the day of such event? Come to think of it, today, there’s a scent of chocolate everywhere……”
“Could it be… that you also don’t know about it?”
Tsurugi became dumbfounded.
“Your lack of common sense sometimes made me wonder how you can become a teacher…… Have you been confined somewhere until now?”
“…………”
“Listen— There is a manner regarding Valentine’s——”
Tsurugi continued proudly talking without noticing Onii-chan being unusually silent.
“Basically, the girls give chocolate to the boys. It’s a love confession to the person you love. And some smart people made a killing by spreading that it’s also a mark of friendship when giving between the girls. There is also boys giving to girls too —— well, it’s a day you send chocolate to the person you love.”
“Ah, is that why Tsurugi-sensei gave me the chocolate cornet?”
“Wh!? No— that’s an misunderstanding, you rotting d*ck!! I-It’s not riding along the mood, that was just a leftover, you idiot!!”
“Well, it doesn’t matter now, in the end, the chocolate cornet was taken by other teachers anyway.”
“Go take the love back.”
“But instead, I got chocolate stick, so I’m satisfied now~”
As I watched the conversation between those two, I somewhat —— felt relieved.
I see, so Onii-chan just doesn’t know Valentine’s.
That’s why this morning, he still acted like usual even after I gave him『The boxed-lunch』, which was unusual from me.
It wasn’t that he didn’t expect it nor he doesn’t like me, it was just because he doesn’t know about it —— and he gave『The boxed-lunch』to Tama who was hungry just because he wouldn’t have known its real meaning.
So that was it.
“But Tsurugi-sensei, I’m curious about something —— About the chocolate, it wouldn’t do if it isn’t given today, right?”
“Eh? Ah, that’s because today is Valentine’s Day. Giving it in another day won’t have the same sense anyway. What about it though?”
“I-I still didn’t get chocolate from Sasami-san……”
Onii-chan was trembling.
“That —— can’t be true…… I don’t believe it……! Sasami-san is unlike me, she is discerning, she sure knows about Valentine’s —— but even so, I still haven’t get chocolate from her…… and I love Sasami-san this much……”
No, I already gave it to you, you know.
Onii-chan just didn’t realize it, right?
“Oh I see, perhaps before dinner, she will personally deliver it in maid uniform and say『I love Onii-chan ☆』with red cheeks……”
I surely won’t wear maid uniform though.
Also, I won’t say『I love Onii-chan ☆』either.
“No, since Sasami-san is a hikikomori —— so she can’t go out to buy chocolate, right? Ahh, all of the mysteries have been solved![1] It can’t be helped that Sasami-san can’t give me chocolate, because she regrettably can’t go out to buy it!”
This world has a convenient thing called mail order, you know, Onii-chan?
As I was dumbfounded, Onii-chan stood up violently.
“It can’t be this way! I need to go buy a lot of chocolate now!!”
“Eh? Right now?”
Tsurugi’s cheeks went red.
“A-Are you an idiot, Tsukuyomi, you blockhead! The repayment for Valentine’s is next month, March fourteenth…… it’s given on White Day. Buying chocolate right now won’t have the meaning of『I also love you, Tsurugi-sensei!』”
“Nee-san, Sensei never says he’ll give chocolate to you.”
Kagami said as she looked at Onii-chan, who was preparing to go out.
“But Sensei, didn’t Nee-san say it just now? —— Valentine’s in this country is basically about girls giving chocolate to guys, right? Sensei giving chocolate to anyone won’t have any meaning. No, they won’t accept it even you offer it anyway……”
“He didn’t say he’ll give it to you either, Kagami.”
Tsurugi and Kagami glared at each other.
As she watched both her sisters in curiosity, Tama pinched Onii-chan’s clothes.
“E-Err… Paparin.”
Because Onii-chan was taller than Tama, so she looked at him with upturned eyes.
She was trembling.
“Tama wants to ask something. This morning-ne… Paparin… gave chocolade to Tama-ne? —— Gave to the l-loved person-ne? Gave chocolade to Tama means… Paparin…… so… ngu—”
“………?”
With her halting speech, Tama finally managed to ask anxiously,
“Paparin love Tama?”
Onii-chan, who couldn’t sense the complicated maiden’s heart, tilted his head in wonder and just took the question at face value.
“Of course! I really love Tama-san!”
Well, for Onii-chan, it’s『really love』to just anyone anyway.
I didn’t know if the『Love』to me and to other girls was the same type or not —— well, let’s just leave that for the time being.
“Howahh.”
It was as if Tama was boiling, she lowered her body and grabbed hold of Kagami tightly.
“Howawawawahh……”
Tightly. Creaking.
“E-Err…”
In the midst of the sound of Kagami hitting the desk and yelling “Give give… give u—p!”, Tama didn’t notice them as she muttered naively to Onii-chan,
“Tama too-ne.”
She became bright red to her ears.
“Tama…… loves Paparin-dao.”
“Thank you very much!”
Between Onii-chan who looked happy as usual, Tama who looked odd, and Kagami who was about to die —— Tsurugi watched them suspiciously.
“Oi, Tama, what’s going on? How come your relationship progressed that quickly? I want to hear about it. Can you explain to Onee-chan in detail? I won’t be angry.”
“Alright, well, Tsurugi-nee!”
Tama, who now returned to her innocent manner, raised her hands happily.
“This morning-ne~ Tama-ne~ got chocolade from Paparin!”
“What did you say—!?”
Tsurugi leaped like a cat and grabbed Onii-chan, with her face covered in her hair, her movement was as if she was a spirit.
“You bastard, don’t just come and raise the flag of my sister like that! Giving chocolate to Tama, huh!? My hard work until now with many events ended up in vain with your『I can’t choose anyone~ Because I love everyone!』, aren’t you going for Harem End!?”
“Eh!? What kind of nonsense is that!? My whole life is going straight on Sasami-san route!!”
“You idiot! Choosing real sister in reality is just going straight to police, you’ll get a Bad End!!”
Please stop talking in gal game terms.
As Tsurugi was still cling tightly onto Onii-chan, she skillfully turned and thrusted her finger towards Tama.
“Guy giving chocolate to girl is heresy! I mean, Tama. You got chocolate in the morning, right? This morning, this guy still didn’t know about Valentine’s at all! It means the chocolate you got doesn’t have any hidden purpose! Don’t be fooled!!”
“Y-Yes……”
Tama looked blankly and then she gave an innocent smile.
“——Even so, Tama is still happy~”
He’s just Onii-chan but he gets himself involved in a love comedy situation, huh.
Anyway.
“Yoisho……tto.”
I took off『Onii-chan Observation Tool』and made a stretch.
Just as expected, it became steaming hot and my shoulders went stiff after wearing it for a while.
I flopped down, applied eye drops then closed my eyes for a while.
“I’m glad… I’m glad…”
It feels slightly irritating that the load on my chest is involuntarily taken off.
But I’m still glad.
Onii-chan just doesn’t know about Valentine’s.
That’s why he can’t imagine the real meaning behind『The boxed-lunch』this morning.
Onii-chan really loves me more than anyone, Onii-chan is the only one who prefers me over anyone else, and loves me.
But depending on that kindness, it’s probably be a morbid thing to indulge on.
“…………”
I raised my body and turned to my PC again.
It was hard to stop grinning.
“Now is to buy chocolate for Onii-chan again.”
Being hikikomori for so long, I spoke to myself a lot.
“But, it’s so troublesome… Now with Onii-chan already knows about Valentine’s, he’d become annoying if I don’t give him though… And it’s too late to tell him what I gave him this morning was chocolate too. If possible, I want a development like『By all means, please give me chocolate, Sasami-san!』as he is kneeling down prostrating, then I went『It can’t be helped then, Onii-chan, you sm*gma.』before giving it to him~……”
I moved the mouse to the mail order home page in『Favorites』folder and clicked.
I jumped from『Food』then『Sweets』to『Chocolate』page.
There were various kinds of special Valentine’s chocolate on display.
It’s better to not buy expensive ones. While we have a lot of money, the expensive ones will be large…… he won’t be able to eat all of it. So I better get small one, just not a cheap-looking one.
As I was thinking so, I checked here and there.
The mail order is sure convenient, even a hikikomori like myself is still able to use it, but it’s still bothersome that I can only see the goods but not touch it before purchase.
Although, normally, I can’t taste food before buying it anyway……
“Come to think of it, if I bought it now, can they deliver it by today……?”
I looked at the time displayed on PC, it was already five in the afternoon.
“It’d probably barely made it if using express service —— with many people buying like this, they should use a helicopter or something for a quick delivery. Or by using the ally of good kids with a name like Kamen Rider…”
As I was complaining about the mail order site, my eyes stopped at『Customers Who Bought This Item Also Bought』which seemed to be recommendations.
Displayed there were the related products such as cosmetics for those maidens in love who bought a lot of chocolate during Valentine’s.
Among them, I spotted the latest volume of the shoujo manga I liked.
“Ah, this new volume is already out…… but I don’t really like the development in the previous volume though, isn’t it just for prolonging purposes? It’s become hard to swallow —— if this one is the same, it’ll be a farewell to buying any more……”
As I was saying that (it was harsh because I love that manga), I checked『This volume’s summary』displayed on the latest volume’s page of that shoujo manga.
Then, I became —— astonished.
『This volume’s summary/The two who are not honest with their mutual love ended up in a quarrel. However, Takuya, who reflected on his own attitude after seeing Mikiko’s tears again, decided to become a first class chocolate artisan. Chocolate is everything. Chocolate is wonderful. He no longer cares about Mikiko. A new shocking development!!』
“That’s too shocking a new development!!”
I inadvertently yelled.
There was no relation to chocolate until the previous volume, wasn’t it!? And what is this!? Normally it’s a high school love manga about fortune telling mixing with a little mysterious, then how on earth did Takuya want to become a chocolate artisan!? In the previous volume, he said『Sorry, I’m… not interest in anything but soccer.』, didn’t he!? I don’t understand what this means at all!!
When I looked carefully, the title which was『Angels’ Love』until now became『Angels’ Love and Chocolate』on this volume. Where did that chocolate come from!?
“Eh? Eh?”
At the same time, I realized it.
Could it be that I mistook it with another manga……? But the first words of the title are the same though…… I clicked on the related products as I thought that, then I noticed a bizarre truth.
“What…… is this……?”
The summaries of other manga and novels were also unnaturally mixed with that word.
Anime is decided! With the school festival approaching, love of the two and chocolate progressing more and more ……The battle action of swords and magics and chocolate!! ……This story contains extreme depiction and chocolate!!
No matter which work, they had mentioned the word ‘chocolate’.
As I looked more, it became even more abnormal.
This story is chocolate contaminated chocolate to chocolate chocolate-ing for chocolate, a painful love story! Both of them chocolate meeting and chocolate the two are chocolate!
It became impossible to understand the meaning anymore.
“It means—— Since it’s Valentine’s, they planned a joke……? So it’ll return to normal tomorrow——? But such a stupid joke like this, I never hea…… H-Huh?”
The screen became black.
There was nothing displayed on the screen. It was a blackout without power loss.
On the deep black screen, was the reflection of my dumbfounded expression.
“Eh, it can’t be the PC is broken!?”
As I became anxious, I tried pressing the keyboard and moving the mouse, but there was no response.
“This can’t be true —— I spent a lot of time and money building this one too…….”
I, who worried about something like that, was probably too optimistic.
The unusual phenomenon which had already put a crack beyond repair on my daily life, at that time I couldn’t have guessed it, I just pretended not to see it, pretended not to notice it, I thought『The strangeness』was just a mere direct hit.
I should have understood my position, I should have done various things.
In other words, I should have did my best.
But I didn’t.
I stayed shut-in, depended on Onii-chan, and lived my life like this for so long.
Even so, paying for it is still terrible, no matter how I put it.
chocolate…
“Hmm?”
Suddenly, a word flowed on the pitch black screen. As if it was a screen saver.
It was just for a moment, but I was sure I wasn’t mistaken.
Then I understood.
I couldn’t think that it was just a prank or a joke from someone —— As I was still trying to act tough,『The strangeness』had already performed『The transformation』of my reality.
That word then filled the PC screen like insects.
give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate
give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate
give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate
give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate
give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate
give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate
give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate
give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate
give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate
give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate
give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate
give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate give me chocolate
give me chocolate give me chocolate…
“Kyaa……”
I involuntarily bent backwards as I recalled the disgusting chill.
“Kyaaaaaa!?”
At the same time, the pitch black mysterious liquid and solid gushed out from the middle of the PC screen —— I was crushed and lost consciousness……
Translator's notes:
1. A famous phrase from Kindaichi Shounen no Jikenbo.
